Alright, I’m wrapping up my posts about The Husband Project today. I know I shared that I got a free copy of the book in exchange for posting about it a few times, but let me reiterate: I sought this opportunity out because I was so excited about reading the book – they did not approach me. I am so glad that I asked, because this little project has been so incredibly inspiring for me and it has helped me spend a lot more time focusing on making my marriage even better and pouring some extra love into our relationship. Read More
Okay, so last time we talked about The Husband Project I shared about my experience and how I felt about it – I can’t say enough positive things about this book and how much it impacted me! I did realize, though, that I didn’t do a great job of explaining what it actually is. So, here goes: The Husband Project is a book that encourages you to do kind things for your spouse on the regular. It’s a 3-week long challenge with different things to do every day that focus completely on making your spouse happy. It definitely was a lot of work but I had so much fun with the challenge that I decided to think up a few more things that I could do for Corey – I didn’t want to be done with it, so why not keep going? I probably won’t keep doing it every single day, but I want to do two or three a week to keep myself thinking of different ways I can make him smile! So, here are 20 more sweet little surprises that I’m going to try to do for him over the next few months.
- Watch the sunset together
- Stay up late in bed chatting
- Cook a fancy meal together
- Send him sweet texts all day long
- Spend the evening totally focused on him, no distractions
- Watch a movie in bed together
- Suggest playing his favorite game or watching his favorite show
- Make a list of reasons I love him and leave it somewhere he’s sure to find it
- Surprise him after work with his favorite drink and a snack
- Go out of my way all day to be kind to him or do things for him
- Implement a daily six-second kiss
- Ask, “what can I help you with today?”
- Thank him for something that I don’t usually notice
- Make breakfast for him before work
- Pray for him (and let him know I did!)
- Initiate a dance party in the kitchen
- Let him sleep in on a weekend morning
- Offer to run an errand that he doesn’t want to take care of
- Order a small gift for him on Amazon – act surprised when it arrives!
- Take Jackson out of the house for a few hours to give him some quiet time at home
I know it’s a little cheesy to have a list of things to do like this, but I’ve got to say that having it written down somewhere was a huge motivator for me to get it done! It really helped me stay focused on how I could make him smile, and it really reminded me of how much I love doing little things for him with no expectation of anything in return. I truly feel like a strong marriage has to have a lot of selflessness in it, and so that’s something I really want to focus more on over the next several months.
What are some of the little things you like to do for your partner?
I’ve always loved doing sweet little things for Corey to surprise him and make him smile. Acts of service is definitely one of my main Love Languages, so it’s also how I enjoy showing love. Over the last year and a half-ish since having Jackson, though, I have to admit that I’ve fallen behind on the job of showing him love in specific and intentional ways. So, when I heard about this book, The Husband Project, I knew it was the perfect way to kick-start me back into making him a priority on a day-to-day basis.
I’ll admit, when I first started reading it there was a part of me that scoffed at the idea of doing all of these sweet things for him with nothing in return. Isn’t marriage supposed to be all about give and take? But then I kept reading, did some praying, and decided that I needed to stop being selfish and spend some time focusing on making him happy just for the sake of making him happy. And of course, just as I suspected, I didn’t end up regretting a single second. It was so worth it, and I quickly noticed that the more sweet, unexpected things I did for him, the more he did for me in return. Within a couple of weeks I felt like we were closer than ever and we were suddenly both seeking out more ways to make the other smile on a daily basis.
I journaled in the book throughout the whole experience, and I thought the best way to share what the challenge was like for me is to share a few of my thoughts from my favorite challenges.
- “30 Minutes is all it Takes” – I struggled with the idea of giving him 30 minutes all to himself when he got home from work…I worked all day too! I’m exhausted too! Where are my 30 minutes? But I offered anyways, and he actually chose to hang out with me and talk instead of being alone, and he was particularly grateful later that night when I offered to clean up from dinner for him.
- “E-flirt.com” – We used to text each other throughout the day pretty often but this year has been so busy that neither of us has time. I did send one random, sweet text on this day, though. Even though he didn’t have time to respond to me, one of the first things he said when he got in the car at the end of the day was how much he appreciated it.
- “A Little Hands-on Attention” – I surprised him with a back rub while we were watching television. He loves them and I rarely do it, so he was thrilled. I think the exact quote was “this is unexpected and amazing!”
- “Stress-be-Gone” – I put his clothes away for him after washing them, and he actually seemed to feel bad that I did it! It showed me that maybe sometimes I do stuff like that for him and then make him feel guilty (“well, you were never going to do it so I figured I’d just do it myself…”) and that’s not fair. This one was a big eye-opener for me!
I was definitely surprised by the challenges that made the biggest impact (it was often the small, easy challenges!) and I had so much fun planning each day. It was an awesome way to reset my brain and get me thinking about what I can do for him instead of worrying about what he’s doing for me. I feel so much happier in general now that I’m spending more time on making him happy, and it just feels so nice to really focus on our relationship for a bit.
Now that I’ve gotten started on this, I don’t want to stop! I’m trying to think of more sweet things I can do for him to keep the momentum going.
Would you ever do this project? What little things do you do to make your spouse feel loved?
Corey and I are back at school this week and are trying to get settled back in for the spring semester – our Christmas break was fabulous but it always throws us for a loop when it’s actually time to get back to work! It’s a bit crazy around here lately, but I just had to pop in for a quick post about today because…
It has officially been four years since this amazing man and I got married.
We’ve been together for nine years now, and I can’t believe that next year we’ll have been together for an entire decade. He makes me so incredibly happy and sometimes I wonder how I got so lucky to find someone that is so perfect for me.
I love our little family and how much our life has changed over the last year. I’m so excited to be celebrating four years with this man, and have a hard time believing that in just a few weeks we’ll be celebrating our son’s first birthday. How did that happen?
We’re celebrating this weekend with a date to one of our favorite restaurants, gifts (we don’t usually do them, so this is a big deal!) and a movie at home. It’ll be our first “real” date in a while, so I’m pretty thrilled!
Happy anniversary, love!
It’s so funny to me how all of the holidays throughout the year that used to be no big deal are now so important and exciting for me. I mean, we’ve always celebrated Father’s Day with our families, but since we weren’t actually parents yet it wasn’t nearly as awesome as it is now. Now? I want to snap a million pictures, soak up all the memories, and enjoy every little holiday to the fullest.
I mean, this is the only first Father’s Day we’ll ever have!
We had a very relaxing Father’s Day this year and it was fabulous. We went out to eat with family, hung out, and just generally enjoyed our little family. I’m so blessed to have such an awesome partner in this crazy parenting adventure, and I can’t imagine doing it with anyone else.
As a little Father’s Day tribute, here are the top 3 things I love about Corey as a dad…
-Jackson’s whole face lights up when he’s interacting with Corey. He looks at him with an admiration that he doesn’t look at anyone else with, and it melts my heart every time.
– I love seeing who Corey is as a father. I’ve always known he was a sweet and wonderful person, but watching how gentle, caring, and just generally awesome he is with Jackson makes me love him even more.
– I love how much Corey loves our son. He gets so excited when Jackson learns something new, and it’s so sweet to see how much he clearly loves him. I could sit and watch them play together all day long – and watching Corey walk around the house with Jackson and talking to him? One of my favorite things in the world.
How was your Father’s Day this year? Anyone else want to share a few things you love about your partner as a parent? Or, if you aren’t one yet, just what you love about your partner in general?